A gentle guide
Ways to
What feels hard to say can bring us closer.
How to use DEEPEN
Use your intuition, or follow a gentle structure.
There is no single right way to play. The only rule is to listen to what is needed in the moment. Choose a card, category, or question that calls to you. Stay with it, skip it, or return another time.
Let the conversation take the shape it needs.
The Pause Card · the heart of DEEPEN
If emotion stirs, pause with it.
Always keep the Pause Card close. When something comes up, place a hand on it and use the guide, or simply respect the pause. Hold space for what wants to be seen, heard, or held, right there and then. You never have to push through.
Reactions can be messengers.
When something big comes up.
A strong reaction can sometimes be connected to a past experience, an old protective pattern, an unmet need, or simply feeling unsafe or overwhelmed in the moment. It may be important, but it does not tell you the whole story and it does not need to be solved right away.
Slow down. Ask what would help you feel safe. Offer presence, not pressure. If either of you feels overwhelmed, stop and reach for professional support when needed.
With enough safety, choice, and care, being met in a hard moment can support understanding and connection.
Meet the deck
Six doors into deeper connection.
Each category opens a different doorway into the conversations that matter.
← swipe through · tap a card to turn it →
When you feel ready
Wild Cards
These questions may take you somewhere unexpected, raw, deep, and vulnerable. Let trust lead. There is no rush to use them.
One gentle way to begin
If you want a little structure.
Arrive
Make space to be present together.
Choose
Follow the card or category that calls to you.
Share
Speak honestly. Listen to understand, not to fix.
Pause or close
Take the time you need, then end with care.
Another way to DEEPEN
Sometimes it is easier to meet the questions alone first.
You can use DEEPEN to reflect on a relationship without bringing every question straight into a conversation. Read, write, and sit with what comes up until you feel ready, or simply let it be yours.
You do not have to play together for the questions to open something.
Remember
Your way is the right way.
DEEPEN is not about getting somewhere. It is about creating enough space to be curious, honest, and present with what is already here.